Saddam
Hussein was taking a nap
A
knock on his door, tap tap tap!
In
walked Kayoosh, phone in hand
“Excellency!
your call from Ireland!”
As
Kayoosh handed him the phone
A
voice bellowed with a groan
“Saddam,
I hereby declare war!
Teach
you a lesson, maybe more! ”
The
voice continued very loud and clear!
“I,
Paddy Murphy, will soon strike fear!
To
drive the Butcher of Bagdad from Erbil
Saddam,
Oh, Saddam, watch your rear!”
The
Butcher of Baghdad didn’t even blink
Calmly
he asked “How big is your team?”
Paddy
slurred, as he tried hard to count
3,
4, no, flive of us, inclush cuzzin
Brown!”
“Stupid
Irish drunk, you better sober up!
I
have a million men, you be sitting ducks!”
Paddy
sobered up but he wasn’t scared
“Begorrah!
Saddam, I will call you back!”
Called
back in a jiffy, he shouted at Saddam
“War’s
still on, we gotten six more arms!
Clearly
sloshed, he rattled on and on
“Conor, Sean and Liam, our new born!”
The
Butcher tried hard not to laugh
“Since
your call, we grew big & tough!
Added
a dozen Sikorskies just for fun
Once the war starts, you will be done!
This
time Paddy thought long and hard
Calling back only after a game of darts
“Saddam
, Saddam, we have strategized
The
last of our worry is your army size.
Saddam
spoke calmly into his phone
“Oh,
I hope this won’t rattle your bone
We
started a solder-get-soldier scheme
Now I have two million men in my team!
Paddy
huddled with his men
Including
tiny newborn Liam
They
decided to take a vote
Paddy furiously taking notes
“Saddam,
Saddam, a decision was made,
The
war’s postponed to a far off date!”
Saddam
the Butcher started to laugh
“You
Irish are scared so don’t bluff!”
The
phone went silent for a minute or two
Then
7 Irish VOICES spoke, as if on cue
“OH,
NO! WE AIN’T SCARED OF YOU
WE
JUST CAN’T FIGURE OUT
JUST
HOW TO GO ABOUT
HOUSING
AND FEEDING
TWO
MILLION IRAQI POWS!
PostScript:
Long
live Paddy the Irish!
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